Christmas – Joy or Despair?

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I want a perfect Christmas – you know what I mean.  The Christmas where everyone comes home, the children and grandchildren are all here and everyone gets along perfectly with no aggravation from anyone.  The house is trimmed from one end to the other with trees, twinkling lights, and mistletoe.   Below the beautifully decorated mantle, a cozy fire is blazing in the fireplace. Christmas music fills the air.  Underneath the tree are presents, each perfect for the receiver and beautifully wrapped.   Filling the air is the fresh aroma of a perfectly cooked meal.  The turkey is moist, the casseroles delicious, and the merriment plentiful.  On the table is everyone’s favorite, many made from recipes that have been handed down for generations.    The children even eat their peas before asking for dessert. Laughter fills every room!  After consuming the huge meal, all the men insist on doing the dishes while the women sit and chat.   (After all we are told men fellowship better when involved in activity.)

In actuality many of us will have an imperfect Christmas.  There’s the person that won’t be at the table because of a family argument, a divorce,  a wayward child or an unexpected death.  Fewer gifts are under the tree because of unemployment.   It’s obvious in the faces of the recipients that the gift wasn’t exactly what they had in mind.  It’s an imperfect Christmas.

The first Christmas began when our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ was born, and it was about as imperfect as they come.  In our heads we have a vision of a perfectly clean baby in a perfectly clean stable, with streams on light beaming down to soften the whole picture.   That is beautiful but that is not reality.

Joseph and Mary left Nazareth traveling eighty miles to Bethlehem to pay their taxes (that alone makes it a very imperfect Christmas!)    They couldn’t hop in their SUV, throwing everything in the back, and drive to Bethlehem.  It was a foot journey.  We see pictures of Mary on a donkey, but we don’t know for sure that she rode on a donkey for any, none or all of the trip.  The Bible doesn’t say how she got to Bethlehem.    One thing for sure, it was not an easy journey.  After His birth, the baby Jesus was laid in a manger, a feeding trough for animals.  I’m sure Joseph cleaned it and did the best he could, but it certainly was not what they envisioned for the baby.    It was not a beautiful, sterile nursery laden with blue curtains and stuffed animals.  If the baby was indeed born in a stable, the animals smelled terrible as did the environment.   Of course we love the song, “… and little Lord Jesus no crying he make.”  Please!

It was a less than perfect Christmas for Mary, Joseph and Jesus, but for that I am thankful.  Jesus Christ, the King, was not born in a beautiful palace with all the perfection afforded to a king.  He was born in a lowly, imperfect environment.  It would be hard for me to identify with a king in a palace, but I can identify with One who understands the imperfections of life.

As the Bentons celebrate Christmas this year, we are so thankful for a victorious Savior who experienced imperfection.   We look forward to time with our children and grandchildren and their laughter, but the empty chair at the table stares at us.  Our son Bryan will be missing.   It is painful and it is, at times, so unbelievable.

We have a choice – joy or despair?  I choose joy this Christmas.  Christmas won’t be perfect in human terms of perfection, but Christ the Savior is born.  He meets us at places of imperfection and pain.  He is the reason for the season.  He is the joy to the world.  His presence and sacrifice make Christmas perfect in the midst of imperfection.   Silent night, Holy night … Christ the Savior is born.   Merry Christmas to all and please don’t allow the imperfections of this Christmas to ruin your day.  When that temptation comes, just sing it with me … “Away in a manger, no crib for a bed, the little Lord Jesus laid down His sweet head.”    Christmas, joy or despair?  Choose joy.

Twenty-One Days of Prayer for the Elections and the United States of America

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Day 1:  Pray for those in authority.  Ask God to help them; intercede on their behalf, and give thanks for them.  “Pray this way for kings and all who are in authority so that we can live peaceful and quiet lives marked by godliness and dignity.”  1 Tim. 2:1-4. Pray for God’s guidance in the election process; that He will place men and women of integrity into positions of influence to seek guidance and protection for our nation in the years to come.

Day 2:  Pray for truthfulness to come forth in the campaign. Father God, You love truth and are displeased with lies. Grant a spirit of truthfulness in the elections, particularly on the part of all media. Grant a spirit of fairness and honesty in the reports created by all members of the media, and give discernment and wisdom to citizens as they seek information from the media. Let people not be gullible but to be discerning about the truth. — Proverbs 12:22 The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful.

Day 3: Father, remind your people that the same hands lifted up to You in prayer are the hands that pull the lever in the voting booth; that the same eyes that read Your Word are the eyes that read the names on the ballot, and that they do not cease to be Christians when they enter the voting booth. “Your word is a lamp to guide my feet and a light for my path.” Psalm 119:105

Day 4: Pray that Americans would understand and heed the fact that our nation’s strength comes from God, not from ourselves. “I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.” Psalm 121:1-2

Day 5: Pray today for voters in the United States, that wisdom will be sought from God (If anyone lacks wisdom, let him ask God is willing to give wisdom. James 1:5). Self-interest will be laid aside for the common good. Discernment between truth and falsehood will be clear.

Day 6:  Pray today for the election and its impact on the world, that voters will consider the foreign policies of candidates and how they fit with biblical principles, the activities of other nations will not have an undue influence on our elections, the result of U.S. elections will serve to spread the gospel around the globe, the U.S. will stand firm in its commitment to Israel’s right to exist as a nation.

Day 7:  Pray today for the purposes of God to be accomplished in the U.S. elections:  Pray that the U.S. will turn and seek first the Kingdom of God.  Pray that God will be honored in the midst of this election campaign. Pray for opportunities for Christians to share their faith and their values in the midst of this election process. Pray that the results of the 2012 elections will please the Lord and release His blessing over this nation.

Day 8:  With all the upheaval against the USA and her embassies: O Lord, I humbly pray that You direct the leaders of this great nation now in this time of crisis. Grant them wisdom and understanding, and help them to respond quickly and effectively to this situation. Direct them that they may do what is right in Your sight. May they follow Your Divine Will to lead our nation on the paths of peace and safety.  O Lord, I pray that You encourage and strengthen our nation. Surround us with Your Love and Mercy! Bring peace and comfort to all those who are suffering as a result of this crisis. In Jesus’ Holy Name. Amen.

Day 9: Father, You are the rock on which this nation was founded.  You alone are the true source of our cherished rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.  Reclaim this land for Your glory.  We ask you to move by your power in this nation and let revival winds blow.  Awaken your church to live in righteousness and take seriously the things of God.  Remind Your people that true happiness is rooted in seeking and doing Your will.    God start the work in me.  I open myself up to the voice and move of  your Spirit.    In the Name of Jesus, Amen.

Day 10:  I thank You for making me a citizen of this land of freedom and unlimited opportunity.  I thank you that the USA was founded on Christian principles and ask you to return us to those principles. Let winds of revival and true Christian living come to me, my church and this country.  Send forth your Spirit to this country, Father.  We are desperate for You. Amen

Day 11:  Pray today for candidates for office in the United States, that they will take brave stands for righteousness, even when it may not be well received; their families will be protected from harm and unnecessary scrutiny; they will surround themselves with godly advisers  they will focus on the issues we face as a nation and not on personal attacks on other candidates.

Day 12:   “If the foundations are destroyed, what can the righteous do?” (Psalm 11:3) Pray that the American people will awaken to the fact that it is our responsibility to act, and to vote!! If we desire to see our nation restored to its true foundations, it is up to us to pray, and to take action! Amen.

Day 13: Pray that repentance would become a lifestyle, so that we are each quick to come before the Lord, confessing our sins and forgiving each other, where needed. (2 Chronicles. 7:14) Pray that we would be quick to forgive our enemies, for they know not what they do.

Day 14: Father, You promise to bless us with rejoicing when righteous leaders are in charge. We ask for godly leaders who will bring joy to those they lead. Do not allow any wicked persons to gain office in this fall’s elections, but only those who will honor You. –Proverbs 29:2 (When the righteous thrive, the people rejoice; when the wicked rule, the people groan.)

Day 15: Father, guide us to pick properly as we vote for those who are running for election. No matter what polls say, I pray that you will have the final say in every election. Lord not our will, but Your will be done. I pray protection for the man that will be President and his family that no hurt, harm or danger come nigh them. Father, heal the rifts in this country. Cause us to be courteous and respectful to each other. May You be honored in our choices and attitudes. Amen.

Day 16:  Our Father, we praise You for Your goodness to our nation, giving us blessings far beyond what we deserve. Yet we know all is not right with America. We deeply need a moral and spiritual renewal to help us meet the many problems we face. Convict us of sin. Help us to turn to You in repentance and faith. Set our feet on the path of Your righteousness and peace.

We pray today for our nation’s leaders. Give them the wisdom to know what is right, and the courage to do it. You have said, “Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord.” May this be a new era for America, as we humble ourselves and acknowledge You alone as our Savior and Lord. This we pray in Your holy name, Amen.   (penned by Billy Graham)

Day 17:  Father, I pray for the upcoming debates between the presidential candidates and the vice presidential candidates.  I pray that the debaters will be truthful and if they are not that it will become evident.  I pray that the man who is to be president will begin to shine forth and there will be a swaying of votes in his direction. We ask that you bring forth the best leader for this country.

Day 18: Pray for the voters who will cast ballots in the elections. I pray that people will go to cast ballots and not stay home.   Pray  that voters will know and correctly discern the true character of each candidate on the ballot (in both the primaries and in the general election). Pray that they will choose wisely, each one being led by the Spirit of the Most High God.

Day 19:  I take up the Sword of the Spirit today.  I bind the spirit of lies and loose the spirit of truth throughout this election cycle.  I bind lies, deception, dishonesty and distortion.  I bind any occult spirits that may be in operation.  In the name of Jesus and by the Spirit of God, I loose truth, honesty, integrity, and ethical behavior.  I know you have all power, O God, so allow truth to come forth.  I ask that the people you have chosen will shine forth.  Amen.

Day 20:  O God, we acknowledge You today as Lord,  not only of individuals, but of nations and governments. We thank You for the privilege of being able to organize ourselves politically.   Thank you for our freedom.  Father, keep us conscious of the fact that our loyalty to this nation does not have to mean disloyalty to You. We thank You for your law, which our founding Fathers acknowledged and recognized as higher than any human law.  May we vote without grumbling but with faith that you are in control of the nations and the future.  I pray that our nation will vote correctly.    We ask for Your influence.  Amen

Day 21:  Pray today for the purposes of God to be accomplished in the U.S. elections. Pray that the U.S. will turn and seek first the Kingdom of God. Pray that God will be honored in the midst of this election campaign. Pray for opportunities for Christians to share their faith and their values in the midst of this election process.  Pray that the results of the 2012 elections will please the Lord and release His blessing over this nation.  (penned by National Prayer Committee)

Bryan Benton, March 11, 1975 – February 11, 2012

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Bryan was born in 1975 and is our middle son. Always full of life, he was a true “people” person with a magnetic personality. As a little boy, he could say “Roll Tide” before he was two years old and it was a part of his vocabulary all of his life. How he would have loved to see Alabama win the national championship this year making it back to back championships. His brother sent a garden flag while I was in NC and I placed it on Bryan’s grave. The flag said Alabama, Back to Back Champions. I know he would have loved it.

Many of our friends have asked all through the year how we are doing. Our family is still strong and our faith is undaunted. God is strong for us and in us. Without a doubt, there is an unbelievable-sized hole in our hearts. Thousands of tears have been shed. He’s our son and we miss him. Gaylon and I would trade places with him today if that was possible.

One of the greatest pains has been that Bryan never met his baby boy Tucker. Oh my goodness – talk about a boy who looks like his dad and has his personality. He even sucks the same two fingers Bryan sucked. Tucker is a joy and such a blessing to Sarah and to all of us. Bryan was so excited, even giddy, about being a father and having a son. We all found out together, just two weeks before his death, that a baby boy would be joining the family. Bryan took us and Sarah’s family out to dinner to celebrate. I read many of the tributes online from customers and friends who saw him that last week, and many talked about his joy at becoming a dad and having a son. He would have been a great father. I spoke at a conference while there the last weekend we saw Bryan, and Gaylon spent all day Saturday with him. I now believe that was a gift from God. The funeral director estimated that at least a thousand showed up for his funeral, though many could not get in the building.

Bryan was a wonderful husband, who deeply loved Sarah, and I do mean deeply. Many photos adorn their home – photos of all the fun trips they took together. Bryan and Sarah lived more in their almost five years of marriage than many couples ever live.

February 11, 2012 is a day that will be forever etched in our memories – the phone call where we learned our son was gone, having to call his brothers and other family members, making the trip to North Carolina to be with Sarah and help plan the service and so many condolences from friends.

We are now experiencing the saying, “life goes on.” I’m determined to make the most of my remaining time here, as I have learned the painful lesson that one can’t count on tomorrow. There’s only today and I plan to use it wisely.

We will always miss you, dear one, but I know God has you in His arms now. I know we will see you again, and I must admit I am more homesick for heaven than ever. We will always talk about you and always celebrate your life. We will stay in close contact with Sarah and Tucker. We will cherish our remaining children and grandchildren, and we will do our part to make the world a better place in whatever time we have left.

One never knows until they walk in the hardest places if faith can truly sustain. I can say, without hesitation, yes it can! Today I can still sing:

My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.
I dare not trust the sweetest frame, but wholly trust in Jesus’ Name.

When darkness seems to hide His lovely face,
I rest on His unchanging grace.
In every high and stormy gale, my anchor holds within the veil.

On Christ the solid Rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

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