A young man stepped to the podium to sing a solo in the morning service. I sat there in the front row, and along with the congregation, awaited a song that would cause us to look heavenward. Oh boy! The music was in one key and he was in another. He left the music way behind, and nothing fit together. Instead of causing us to be lifted heavenward, we all wished he would hurry and finish, which he did, way before the background music!

In a conversation I learned that the man loved to sing but was tone death. He wanted us to be receptive, but the wrong tone killed the whole thing. The problem was not the message but the tone. Tone has to do with using different elements: volume, speed, pitch of voice, body language, and gestures, etc., to name a few.

In my own life, tone is something of which I must be aware. Even though what I am saying might be right, the tone might cause it to come across wrong.

We are in a time when we must boldly stand for truth. BOLDLY! I refuse to accept what the Bible does not accept. I understand everyone is not going to like my stand or agree with me. What I do not want to do is add fuel to the fire by my tone.

We live in a time of too much anger and hostility. Couples scream and yell at each other. Politicians berate one another. Christians “tell each other off.”   Facebook posts are often rudely stated. People are quick to give the middle finger of fellowship. Parents declare that the only way their children will listen is if they yell. (By the way, that is only true if you conditioned them that way.)  

When it comes to dealing with others, God is saying to sing in one key, yet we often we sing in whatever key we want. That is a tone problem.

I do not want to be an angry, ugly, red-faced, condescending, name-calling, arrogant child of God. I want to stand boldly for God. I want to have the best relationships I can. I want to be a good communicator of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I might be rejected, but I do not want it to be because of my tone. I want to set the right tone. How about you?

Proverbs 15:1: A soft answer calms anger, but a harsh word stirs up more fury. Proverbs 16:24: Kind words are like a sweet honeycomb; they are good for the body and heal the spirit.

“My voice You shall hear in the morning, O Lord; In the morning I will direct it to You, And I will look up.” Psalm 5:3

Are you a morning person or a night owl? We hear that question a lot. It would be a massive understatement for me to say I am not a morning person. I come into total agreement with  Proverbs 27:14, “A loud and cheerful greeting early in the morning will be taken as a curse!” Can I get an amen!

Of course, I am married to Mr. Cheerful, Mr. Sunshine, Mr. Smiley, Mr. Talker. He is all of those things!

Over the years, I am much better at morning. I have learned to move on from hazy and lazy much more quickly. I am still mostly quiet for the first hour. I move a little slowly that first hour. But when I must do morning, I can!

One thing I have embraced is that the quicker I get my thoughts on God, the better I face my day. When my feet hit the floor, I make a beeline to the kitchen to start the coffee, stop by the bathroom, and then make my bed. Next, I sit with God a few minutes while I sip my coffee. I fill my ears, heart, and mind with songs of worship. I begin to talk to the Lord about my day, my love for Him, my family, and other things in my heart. After reading a couple of short devotions, I stop and think of the Lord.

How do you begin your mornings? Getting up at the very last minute, then rushing to get to the day’s responsibilities? Dreading the day? Perusing social media?

The psalmist said that early in the morning, he set his thoughts on God. This is not a “guilt-trip” devotion for those who spend time with God later in the day. It is encouragement to set your eyes upon the Lord, if only for five minutes, in the morning. Starting my day with Him reminds me that I walk with God through the day. It offers me such sweet fellowship with the King of kings.

David said, “I will look up.”

Giving those few minutes to God will prepare us for the day ahead. On any given day, we encounter places that test us, try us, or upset up. That is simply a fact of living on this earth. There is something special about looking up shortly after getting up! It helps with the stresses of the day. If you are not looking up to Him each morning, commit to doing that. Start today. What a difference it makes.

In a world that seems to be filled with anger and discontent, it is easy to concentrate on the negatives in life. I came across a story that is a breath of fresh air. If God lets me live to be the age of this woman, I hope I can leave deposits of joy around me. The following story is so heartwarming.

“Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time,” she said. This story about a ninety-two-year-old woman has been shared over two hundred thousand times. When you read it, I think you will understand why. It all has to do with her attitude.

Here is what Alex Steblowsky wrote about Peggy Jones:

This petite, well-poised and proud lady, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o’clock, with her hair fashionably coiffed and makeup perfectly applied, even though she is legally blind, moved to a nursing home yesterday. Her husband of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary.

After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, she smiled sweetly when told her room was ready. As she maneuvered her walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of her tiny room, including the eyelet curtains that had been hung on her window.

“I love it,” she stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy.

“Mrs. Jones, you haven’t seen the room …. just wait.”

“That doesn’t have anything to do with it,” she replied. “Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time.” Whether I like my room or not doesn’t depend on how the furniture is arranged, it is how I arrange my mind. I already decided to love it. It is a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do.”

“Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open, I’ll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I have stored away, just for this time in my life. She went on to explain, “Old age is like a bank account, you withdraw from what you have put in. So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories.”

And with a smile, she said, “Remember the five simple rules to be happy.”

Free your heart from hatred.
Free your mind from worries.
Live simply.
Give more.
Expect less and enjoy every moment.

Today is a good day to arrange our minds to acknowledge and testify of the goodness of God in our lives. The Apostle Paul wrote powerful words in Philippians 4:11-13. As you read them, do so with an awareness of Paul’s circumstances when he wrote them. Paul was in a dreary, cold, dark prison simply for being a follower of Christ and preaching the Good News.

“Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.”

Recently, I was opening a tub of ice cream. My grandson requested Blue Bell Pecan Pralines ice cream. (Trust me. Unless you have nut allergies, it is a must try.) Blue Bell comes in round containers, and the lid can be hard to remove. As I moved around the circular top, pulling all along the way, my fingers slipped. The pain was immediate and harsh. I did not realize until later just how bruised I was.

The injury to my pinky was immediate and unexpected. I never saw it coming. I was simply doing life and a hard hit came.

Life has a way of leaving marks on us. Though my bruise was a physical one, bruises in life can come in many ways. The hits can bruise our spirits, our emotions, and our relationships. Open wounds bleed and cause us to seek immediate relief. Bruises are a bit different. We might feel the initial impact, but the wound is below the surface and shows up later.

Bruises are the hidden impact of hard hits. The loss of job is immediate, but the impact can be felt for weeks even months. The loss of a loved one has an initial hit, but the bruising grief can last much after the initial impact. Hurts from fellow believers and Christian leaders can be felt immediately and for an exceedingly long time afterward. There is the disappointment that comes from people we love. There are so many more examples of life’s bruising.

The bruises of life are not always seen by others. We can look perfectly fine on the outside, but underneath, we are tender to the touch.

Apostle Paul shared with us that he had experienced bruises.

^“We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed but not driven to despair. We are hunted down but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed.” – 2 Corinthians 4:8-9.

Brother Paul said, “I have been bruised, but it did not destroy me. God brought me through it.”

My finger is slowly healing, and the bruise is beginning to fade. It has not been an overnight thing, but it is slowly healing. I have never once spoken to my finger and said, “Get over the bruise. Straighten up. Get over the pain.” Neither does God speak to our bruises that way.

God is not indifferent to our bruises. Perhaps you are feeling very tender where you have been bruised. God cares very much about those tender places. He was well acquainted with bruising. How do I know this? Here are a few reasons why I know this.

• “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” – Psalm 147:3
• “A bruised reed He will not break.” – Isaiah 42:3
• “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. – Psalm 34:18
• “For I will restore health to you, and your wounds I will heal, declares the Lord.” – Jeremiah 30:17
• “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you.” – Isaiah 41:10
• “Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.” – Psalm 23:4

If you are hurting today, run to God’s presence. You do not need to pretend to be strong for God. Your bruise is not a liability to Him; it is an invitation for His tenderness. You can stop trying to hold yourself together. Let the One who created you hold you instead. God cares about every bruise life has brought you.

Gaylon and I met a couple a while back. We have had the pleasure of sharing dinner with them. Joshua is the pastor Cowboy Church not far from us. They are a nice couple, doing the work of the Lord. Lauren is the wife and she recently wrote this, and I asked permission to use it. Lauren is not a “stage” person. God needs a whole lot of Christians who are not “stage” people, but people simply willing to be used by God. Thank you, Lauren, for this great reminder.

Let me preface this by saying, this is not to make anyone think highly of Joshua or myself. We do not want praise for any of it, we do not deserve it, all praise belongs to God and God alone. But I want to share a story in hopes that, if you feel a little like me, this might help shift your perspective and encourage you.

If you know my husband, you know he is a talker. Anyone, anywhere, anytime, about anything, he can talk. He has the gift of gab, which is good considering he is a pastor and his ‘day job’ is sales. You have to be able to talk to do those jobs. If you know me, you know I am the opposite. I am an anxiety riddled introvert that struggles to hold conversation with people I do know, much less people I do not.

Today Joshua met a man while at his day job that, to make a long story short, is having a hard time. He was living in his truck until it got impounded and has been sleeping in the woods in Irondale for several days. Joshua felt convicted to talk to him, so he did. Learned a little bit about him and how he ended up where he was. He told Joshua he was doing some odd jobs to try to get enough money to buy a tent until a family member was able to come pick him up from Mississippi. He texted me to tell me about it and I said, ‘Didn’t we buy a tent a few years ago that we’ve never used?’ Again, to make a long story shorter, yes, we did and we had a sleeping bag too. So, I packed the bag. Tent, sleeping bag, a blanket, and some nonperishable snacks. Joshua comes back home to pick it up and takes it back to him. He is grateful, we are thankful we were able to help even in a small way, all is well. And all I had to do was pack a bag.

See, I am not great at talking to people, and as a Christian, and especially as a pastor’s wife, I have always felt a little guilty about that. And sometimes the Lord gets my attention when He needs to and sometimes it puts me in a situation that is uncomfortable for me, and that is fine. But so much more often, He only asks me to pack the bag. Your calling may not put you on a stage with a mic in your hand, and that is ok. Your calling may be behind the scenes, in the background, and sometimes you may feel like you are not doing enough because what you are doing does not look like what someone else is doing. But somebody has to pack the bag. So, if you feel like me today or any other time, I hope this encourages you. Doing what God has called you to do matters and is for a purpose. And if all He has asked you to do is pack the bag, then do it and rest in the assurance that you are exactly where you are supposed to be.

Why do people come into church late and then proceed to climb over people to get to a seat? This and other thoughts were going through my mind recently on a Sunday morning.

Gaylon and I were seated about halfway back in our church auditorium. I like sitting there because there is plenty of leg room, and no one must climb over you to get to a seat. There is a natural divide between the two sections in the auditorium. I love those seats.

One Sunday, a family came in late and proceeded to look for seats. I saw quite a few seats that were easily accessible for four people. In my mind, I am thinking the logical thing is to take seats that do not require climbing over people. This family did not do what my mind was telling them to do!

I noticed they selected seats that required about six people to either step out for them to get on the row or sit down so they could get into those seats. Come on, people! Where is your common sense?

When they finally reached the seats they had chosen, the couple beside them hugged them so tightly. They knew each other. The family already sitting there had invited them to the church service.

As the invitation was given, one of the visitors raised their hand for prayer. I had jumped to a very bad decision about these people looking for a seat!

How many times do we find ourselves jumping to conclusions about others without knowing all the details? We often make judgments based on how things appear, yet there is a very good chance that there are details we do not know.

There is no way that we can know the motives of another, nor can we know all the circumstances surrounding things we see. Often, what we think we know, we really do not. As we walk through life with others, before we “go-off” on someone by deep sighs, eye rolling, blowing our horns angrily, or spewing our opinions, let’s remember that only God is all-knowing. Contrary to what we might think, jumping to conclusions is not a beneficial form of exercise.

“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” James 1:18

Recently, I was enjoying coffee at my favorite coffee shop in Alabaster, Alabama. I live in Helena, but Alabaster is a short drive. I love to sip coffee and read or study the Bible.

As I finished my time at the coffee shop, I got into my car and headed home. Traffic was very heavy, so I caught a lot of red lights. At one light, I found myself sitting on a bridge over Interstate 65. I had to sit on the bridge for about three minutes. There was traffic beside me, in front of me, and behind me. I would have to spend bridge time because I was surrounded on every side.

There was also super-fast traffic below me. People were flying down Interstate 65 which caused the bridge to shake slightly.

As I sat on the shaky bridge, I began to think how terrible it would be if the shaking caused the bridge to crumble and collapse. Then, I brought my mind into a better place by remembering I was not trusting the shaky bridge, I was trusting the ones who constructed the bridge. The bridge that was holding me up was only as good as the one behind it.

Recently, we have seen a whole lot of shaking going on in the Church, the USA, and the world. I can testify that my husband and I find ourselves in some shaky, unsettling situations right now. Last night was a bit rough. I found myself wide awake with a racing mind about the situations we are facing personally and in the world. The “what ifs” bombarded my mind. (Yes, I am a strong believer and woman of prayer. Even Paul spoke of sleepless night. “We have been beaten, been put in prison, faced angry mobs, worked to exhaustion, endured sleepless nights, and gone without food.” – 2 Corinthains 6:5)

As I sat on that shaky bridge, I remembered that the one who created the bridge made it in such a way that it would hold up during shaky times. These days, I often have to bring this to my remembrance.

I must pause and remember, “I can do (can face, can endure) all things through Christ who strengthens me.” – Philippians 4:13. I must pause and remember, “He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.” – Isaiah 40:29. I must pause and remember, “Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might.” – Ephesians 6:10. I must pause and remember, “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” – Joshua 1:9

Today, my bridge is feeling a bit shaky, and I would like to get off the bridge to a place where I feel steadier. Friend, today I had to remind myself that when my confidence gets shaky, when my heart grows faint, and I feel like I cannot make it through the shaky place, I have to stop and remember whose strength is holding the bridge. I will be steadfast in Him when times are shaky.

Today, I am prophesying this over myself and challenge you to do the same. “The LORD will guide you continually, and satisfy your soul in drought, and strengthen your bones; You shall be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.” – Isaiah 58:11

Prayer: Lord, help us hold tight to Your truth. You are our steadfastness in shaky times. Amen!

Social media can drive me crazy or get on my last nerve! Who can say, “Amen to that!”

While I love keeping up with family and with friends I have met all over the nation, it is all the other stuff through which I must wade! It takes deep boots to wade through Facebook with the many advertisements and the negative, heated posts between people. (Knock it off if you are doing that!)

One thing I do like about Facebook is the groups of which I am a member. I live in Helena, Alabama, which is a suburb of Birmingham. I follow a group for things happening in Helena, and it keeps me up to date with what is happening or what has happened. I am also a member of a group strictly for residents of my neighborhood. Having nearly fourteen hundred homes in the ‘hood, it is a large community.

Recently, a neighbor posted something that caught my eye immediately. Her husband was missing. “Bill” has Alzheimer’s. Bill went into the backyard which was fenced but went out of the gate and wandered away. The neighborhood resident was in a panic to find Bill.

It was so moving to see the many responses from people as they read the post. Many offered to drop what they were doing and drive or walk around the neighborhood looking for Bill. Others offered to comb the nearby woods and walking trail looking for Bill. Many began praying for Bill to be found. Others were willing to be with the wife or to go with her to look. Within a short time, someone saw Bill walking down the road. They stopped and called his name, and Bill looked at them. About the same time, a policeman came up and Bill was returned. Bill had been lost but now was found.

The priority of the neighborhood was to seek what was lost!

People could easily have said, “I have my own stuff I’m doing right now.” Or “I’m sure someone will find Bill.” Perhaps, people could have thought, “Bill is not my responsibility.”

The priority of God’s Church has been and should always be to seek what is lost. Listen, I love a good church service filled with worship and word. I love chatting with and hugging friends I see when we gather. I attend small groups and have lunch or coffee with fellow Christians. All that is wonderful and needed.

BUT – I think that we now enjoy being with the church, rather than being the Church. It is so easy to forget what Jesus said as He ascended back to His Father.

‘And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” ‘ Matthew 28:18-20.

Friends, Bill is lost. Gloria is lost. Michael is lost. Stella is lost. Brothers and sisters are lost. Co-workers are lost. Uncles and aunts are lost. Hairdressers are lost. Like “Bill” in my neighborhood, many do not even realize they are lost.

Followers of Jesus are called to be part of His “search party”. It is the responsibility of believers to actively seek out those who are lost rather than waiting for them to walk through the church doors. This challenge I give to myself and to you, that we will begin to make finding the lost our priority. That we will open our eyes to seek the lost. Enjoy “church” but be the Church to a generation that desperately needs the Lord. It is every believer’s calling.

“Hello, God. It’s me again. You know, your servant Barbara Benton. I am checking in again because it seems like you are not responding.”

Have you ever felt this way? I have! Recently, I have had heavy things on my mind and in my heart. Heaviness tries to go to bed with me and wake up with me. My “hot line” to God seems barely lukewarm. Yep, here I am, national speaker, counselor to others, and God seems silent. Some days, I have felt like a third sister to Lazarus. Barbara, Mary, and Martha thinking, “Lord, where are you!”

One morning our grandson Joseph was visiting. Joseph is on the autism spectrum, so there are things He does not quite understand yet. But there is one thing Joseph gets very well – singing the praises of God.

My mind was on the heavy things of life, and silently I was crying out to God. Suddenly Joseph began to sing aloud the words of a song. I was not familiar with the song, so I listened carefully and wrote down the words, so I could find the song. “Your Love Never Fails” is the name of the song.

You stay the same through the ages
Your love never changes
There may be pain in the night
But joy comes in the morning.

And when the oceans rage
I don’t have to be afraid
Because I know that you love me
Your love never fails

Joseph sang the song over and over and over. He walked and sang. He sat and sang. He sang! The words began to penetrate my heart. God was singing to me through the words of a child who does not always understand things, but who does understand the joy of praise.

When God says that His ways are not our ways, He is not kidding! (Isaiah 55:8) I love the encounters with God where He breaks into my life with great power, fixes my situation, and waters my garden of faith. I love that experience! Don’t you?

There are times we will also experience a season when life presses in on us, or when life leaves us shattered and darkness descends. We cry out to the God who can change anything, the God who loves us, and He seems silent, even absent.

As I pondered the song and the seeming silence of God, He seemed to break through and say, “Barbara, just wait. I am not finished with the conversation.” 

Are oceans still raging around me? Indeed, they are! While God might seem silent in our pain, joy comes in the morning. God might be silent, but He is not still!

“It is good that a man or woman should hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD.” – Lamentations 3:26

Many things can be said about Gaylon and me, but it cannot be said that we are wealthy! We have been careful with finances especially as we approached our golden years. We have tried to be wise financially, generous in helping others, and trust God with the rest.

As I was shopping in a local grocery store, I inserted my debit card to pay for my groceries. I requested forty dollars cash back. I had not one dollar of cash in my wallet, so I decided I should get a little. The transaction went smoothly, so I headed out the door.

About five minutes down the road to home, I remembered that I did not collect my forty dollars in cash. I quickly turned my car around and headed back to the store. I hurried into the store to check for my cash, but there was no cash at the register.

Three employees were standing right by the register, so I asked if anyone had turned in money. All said, “No!”

After getting in my car and heading home once again, I was a wee bit upset. Forty dollars for us was a lot of money, especially at that time. I was sad, angry, and upset!

When I arrived home, I put away my groceries and sat down. All I could think of was those forty dollars. Finally, I talked to God about it. “Father, it is hard for us to lose forty dollars. God, please let it be in the hands of someone who really needed it. I place that money in Your hands.”

A couple of weeks later, I was in the same shopping area. There are ten or twelve shops in the strip mall. I parked far away, as I often do, to get extra steps of exercise. It was a windy day. As I began to walk towards the mall, a brisk wind suddenly blew. I looked down, and I saw paper blowing towards me and it stopped at my feet. I picked it up. It was a fifty-dollar bill.

I wanted to return the fifty dollars to the rightful owner, but how would I identify the owner? There were several stores, and I was far from the strip mall. I looked around and saw no one appearing to look for lost money. I sat in my car and watched for a while trying to see if someone was looking for the lost money. I put the money in my wallet. After arriving home, I checked all the social media groups in our area trying to see if the money was reported as lost. Nothing about someone losing money was there.

I continued looking at the groups for the next couple of weeks. No one ever posted about losing money.

Is it possible that God replaced my forty dollars and then some? I believe that to be true! I serve a “then some” God.

Through almost fifty-five years of marriage and ministry, Gaylon and I have known lean times and bountiful times. We have known times when we were not sure how we would put gas in the car for me to get to work. Serving God does not mean there will never be financially challenging times. There will be. But as I look back over fifty-five years, I can truly sing:

He’s been faithful, faithful to me
Looking back, His love and mercy I see
Though in my heart I have questioned
Even failed to believe
That He’s been faithful, so faithful to me!

Psalm 37:3 NKJV reminds us of this when the writer says, “Trust in the LORD, and do good; Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.”

God’s faithfulness will be with us when seasons are good and when seasons are bad. I can declare, without hesitation, God has been faithful to me.

Are you feeling fear right now about what might be ahead? I have found that sitting down and reminiscing about God’s faithfulness changes my fearful heart to a trusting heart. Remember that you serve a God who can send a wind to blow blessings into your life when you least expect it.