In July of 2017 I missed the bottom stair of a set of stairs and went sailing through the air.  Since I had an audience of five, my pride was definitely hurt, but that was nothing compared to the physical injury.  I had a severely broken ankle,  tibia and big toe.  How I wanted to bounce right back up from that floor and continue my day!  That was not to be.

I can’t count how many times the doctor said, “This is a very severe injury.”   And, he was correct. The recuperation was slow, painful, and challenging.

Our grandson Andrew is four and quite a conversationalist.  Even though it has been six months since my fall, Andrew is rarely with me that we don’t have a conversation about my ankle.   He loves to talk about it.  Andrew lets me know that he can run, but I can’t run because I broke my leg, or he can climb a ladder, but I can’t because I broke my leg.  He does make me smile!

Recently while visiting us, Andrew was ready for lunch.  As I rose from my chair, I stood there a second to get my stiff ankle working.  I headed towards the kitchen, and Andrew said, “It’s hard for you to walk because you broke your leg.  You have to walk like a penguin.”

Penguin?  I really never gave much thought to how I looked when I walked.  I began to pay attention to my walk, and sure enough I could see that I waddled like a penguin.   After surgery, weeks of sitting in a chair with a propped-up leg, physical therapy, and learning to walk again, I was walking like a penguin!   I did not want to walk like a penguin!

From that day forward, I began paying very close attention to my walk.  I realized that I had let my wound, and the fear of more pain, cause me to walk like a penguin.  I began to concentrate on my steps.   I began to work at walking healed, like I walked before the wound and pain took up residence.

It has been almost a month since that conversation with Andrew, and I no longer walk like a penguin! Occasionally, if I’ve been on my foot too long, there is a little limp, but I don’t walk like a penguin!  Walking healed also revealed that it was more painful when I walked like a penguin.

Thank God Andrew spoke into my life!  Andrew caused me to realize that the wound was healed, and it was time to walk again!

It is so easy in life or church to be terribly wounded causing excruciating pain. Sometimes we might have to sit it out (withdraw) for a while, so healing can take place. God allows that for the purpose of healing, but it was never meant to be a permanent situation.   It’s very inviting to permanently allow wound and pain to be our master.  God’s plan is that healing be our master.

Thank God that Andrew Benton spoke truth to me!  Thank God that I responded!  It changed my walk.

Who do you allow to speak truth to you? We all need people who will speak truth, in love, to help us walk in healing and wholeness.   We all need loving accountability partners.  Accountability is not a negative term.   An accountability relationship is simply one in which two or more believers prompt each other to grow closer to the Lord.  This can be accomplished through questioning, challenging, admonishing, confessing, and encouraging. The purpose of this relationship is to help each other grow spiritually.

Child of God, be careful about allowing pain and wound to direct your walk.   Trust me when I tell you that penguin walking is more painful than learning to walk healed.

Thank God Andrew spoke. Thank God I listened.

Six years ago, on February 11, 2012, Gaylon and I got a call that no parent wants to receive.    I remember watching my husband as he received the news, “Your son went into cardiac arrest and we were unable to resuscitate him.”   The pain in Gaylon’s face and voice were beyond description.

For the next few days, it was as if time stopped. My mind played and replayed that phone call, hoping it was just a bad dream.  How is it possible that  Bryan would never meet his unborn son?  How would Christmas be the same?  What will Mother’s Day and Father’s Day be like?

There is the marvelous joy of knowing that we can be reunited with loved ones who have gone to be with our Lord.  Yet, there is the depth of pain and sorrow that we can’t physically touch our loved ones or talk with them. You wish you could say, “I love you!” just one more time.

Grief is a personal, intense journey that all of us will experience at some point.

The scripture tells us in 1 Corinthians 15:55, “O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?”  I believe God’s word, and though death does not sting, emotional bees will swarm around those of us left behind.  As a Christian believer, I was able to rejoice that Bryan was with his Heavenly Father, but as a mother, my heart was crushed.

Circumstances can change so quickly.  Life hands us difficulties we don’t understand and can’t explain. All of us face moments in life when we are overwhelmed.  It is hard to find ourselves in situations that alter life, situations that are unfair, and situations outside our control.

For nearly forty-nine years, I have walked with God.   There have been the most glorious times, and there have been times that have knocked the breath out of me. February 11, 2012 was suffocating.    Would we ever feel like laughing again?  Would we ever wake up and not feel such heavy grief?

After the flowers faded, the phone calls lessened, and the meals stopped coming, I had to face the reality of this painful twist that life had brought.  I had to choose, “Do I let grief take over, or do I give my grief to God, and ask for His strength?”  Over and over I cried out to the God of my salvation, and over and over He gave me strength.

What will you do when life knocks the breath of out of you?

Death is not the only thing that can knock the breath out of us.  There are other events that have the force to utterly crush us and turn our world upside down. It may be the death of someone we love, a cancer diagnosis, a betrayal by a person we trusted, or financial ruin.  The list of life-altering situations that we can experience is a very long one.

Do you feel like you are being suffocated by life?  Has stress taken its toll, causing you to feel afraid, discouraged, lonely or ready to give up? Is your heart broken today? Run to God! He is ready. He is willing. He is able. There is so much power and grace available when we turn our eyes upon Jesus and look full in His wonderful face.

Yes, life can knock the wind out of us, but God can give it back. Trust Him, lean on Him, love Him and you will catch that breath once again.  You will be amazed what God can bring you through, and He will bring you through.

The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous, and His ears are open to their cry for help … the righteous cry out, and the LORD hears, and delivers them from all their troubles. The LORD is near the brokenhearted; He saves those crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:15-18).

“Even though the fig trees have no blossoms, and there are no grapes on the vines;  even though the olive crop fails, and the fields lie empty and barren; even though the flocks die in the fields, and the cattle barns are empty, yet I will rejoice in the Lord!

I will be joyful in the God of my salvation! The Sovereign Lord is my strength!   He makes me as surefooted as a deer, able to tread upon the heights.  – Habakkuk 3:17-19

The prophet Habakkuk sums up life, doesn’t he? 

On this Christmas Eve morning, I have been thinking and pondering the things going on around me.

• Wrapping gifts for our family members, and remembering that, once again, we won’t wrap a gift for our son Bryan.
• Unanticipated hits on our budget this year.
• Friends who lost their daughter last night, a mom who won’t see her children grow up, and won’t see them open Christmas gifts.
• The state of our country, in light of the Word of God.
• The endless political drama.
• Several mass killings this year.

I could go on and on, and many of you could chime in quickly, adding your difficulties. There have been some very good places, but 2017 has been challenging.  Yet, while it might seem crazy to some, I still have great hope and faith, that God is the strength of my life.

Sometimes it feels like we are on shaky ground, and that at any moment, the earth will open and we will be swallowed up.  Habakkuk reminds us that God will cause us to be sure-footed in the treacherous places.

Habakkuk also has a “yet” praise!  I choose to have a “yet” praise!

It’s easy to praise and be joyful when things are going well.   But, the truth of life is, that life won’t always go well, even when we serve God.   When we face sickness, hardship, challenges and unfairness, and still offer a  “yet” praise, it shows that something supernatural has occurred in our lives.  It shows that the living God is within us.  He is Immanuel, the God who is with us!

Immanuel is with me today!  I will celebrate what I DO have this season and not focus on what I DON’T have.  Immanuel is with me today!  In this season, I choose to go deeper in experiencing the love of the Father who gave His only Son so that I can truly LIVE!  Immanuel is with me today!  I have received the greatest gift of all – Jesus! I therefore embrace this Christmas season with unprecedented joy!  I will have a “yet” praise!

“‘Believing God when “the chips are down” is one of the most difficult things that we will ever be called to do. Yet if we trust the Lord only when things are going well, then we do not really trust Him at all. When things are good, let us thank God for His blessings, but also ask Him to sustain our faith if we face real hardship. As we walk through dark times, let us ask Him to help us rejoice in Him and remember that He is our exceedingly great reward.”  – R. C. Sproul

Time heals all wounds, we are told, but that is not totally true.   What we do with time determines the healing process.

On the left is a picture of my air boot on the first day I was fitted.  The picture on the right is the boot three weeks later.  Notice that when I first put the boot on, I could not pull the strap very far across my foot.  There was still so much swelling and pain in the foot.   On the right, three weeks later the strap is well over an inch tighter.  It’s amazing what can happen over time.

I was given clear instructions of how to continue to promote healing, and to begin to walk again.   There have been days I have wanted to do anything but go to therapy, exercise my foot and ankle, or practice walking on one crutch.  But, I want healing; therefore I use my time to walk towards healing.  I go through the pain of pushing through the parts of therapy that hurt, some of which almost bring me to tears.   

As times continues to tick, I expect total healing, because of what I am doing with my time.

Where are you wounded?  Was it from childhood abuse?  Church hurt?  Rejection from a spouse or friend?  Food addiction? Grief?  There is healing, but we must remember that healing is a process, not an event. 

If we continue to walk out healing, healing will come.  I don’t know why God doesn’t heal all our hurts,  or for that matter, stop them from even occurring.  But, this I know about my God: He is a healer.   Trust the process.  Use your time to walk towards healing, not to stay stuck.

Remember, healing is a process, not an event. 

“We interrupt this regularly scheduled program to bring you this important announcement!” Sound familiar?  And, does it seem to always come at the best time in the program?

I love summer.  I LOVE SUMMER.  It is my favorite time of the year. 

I love:

• No coats or jackets.
• Warm weather. NEVER being cold.
• Early evening walks. Daylight!!!
• Lots of cooking on the grill.
• Sandals and flip flops.
• Parks with the grandchildren.
• No coats required for the grandchildren.
• Festivals and markets.

On July 21, I broke my ankle and leg, while in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.   Since that time, I’ve been out only for the drive back to Birmingham, and trips to go to the doctor.  I’ve been in a chair with my leg propped up, and watched through the window as the days got shorter and shorter. 

My season was interrupted. 

Life is filled with interruptions, inconveniences, frustrations, and unexpected events. Things break (including bones). Accidents happen. The phone rings as soon as you get in the recliner at the end of the day. Appliances break.  Stuff happens.  Interruptions come without invitation!

When my season was interrupted, I was less than happy.  Surgery, pain and dependence on others became part of my world.  I remember lying in a hospital bed, and talking to God.  “Lord, I don’t want to be ungrateful, difficult, and angry because my season changed in a moment of time.  Walk with me through the season. I trust You with this interruption.”

In scripture, there were people whose lives were interrupted, and they became life-changing moments.  Mary, the mother of Jesus, had her happy life interrupted by an angel.  She later gave birth to the Son of God, who would change the world.  Saul was interrupted on his trip on the road to Damascus.  He would later become Paul, the apostle who would write more than half of the New Testament.   Their interruptions became their new “to-do-list” from God.

When our great season becomes not-so-great, God will use these times to stretch our faith.  He can do a new thing in our lives.  An interrupted life can reveal whether we are standing on the Rock or sinking sand.  Do I trust God with the details of my life, and the interruptions?  Is His grace sufficient?  Will I find that He is enough to sustain and give strength for the season?  Yes, yes, and yes!

What will you do with your interruptions?  I hope you will lean on these words. 

^“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.” – (Proverbs 3:5-6)

While visiting a friend in Florida, we went on a little shopping spree.  I love to shop with people, if it’s people with whom I love to shop.  (You know what I mean!)

My friend wanted a new television for her bedroom, so after much searching and researching, we found the right television at a good price.   The television was loaded into her car, and off we went, ready to set it up immediately.  Being single, my friend has learned a lot about setting up electronics correctly.  I’d be lost!

Once the new flat screen was ready, she wanted to know how it looked.  I stretched back on the bed, reclined against the pillows and looked at the television.  I hated to tell her, but the screen was terribly blurry. 

After telling her how blurry the screen was, she redid the cables and we gave it another try.  After three times of this, it was disheartening. Alas, she had a bad television!

I sat up to help her get the box, so we could take the television back to the store.  I looked at the screen one more time, and it was crystal clear.  Then, I realized, while reclining on the pillows, I was looking at the television through the bottom of my bifocals. That  part is for magnifying the letters so I can read.  It is definitely not good for media use!

There was no problem with the television.  The problem was I needed a correct focus.

In talking with many people, I find they are so hard on themselves.  Raise your hand if that is you!  (I am raising both hands, one leg and one broken leg!) 

Too often we see with blurred distortions. Remember this:  What I see is not always the same as what actually is. 

Emotions are such a wonderful part of life, but emotions are not always accurate.  There are days that our vision tells us that we are worthless, ugly, useless, less-than, a failure, unwanted and a host of other things.  Our emotions might tell us those things and even more; but that doesn’t mean it’s so.  Emotions can cloud our view of the accuracy of what God says.

Too often our spiritual eyes are blinded by what others say about us or do to us.  If we are not careful we will hoard hurtful comments, and feast on them day after day.  We will watch television and think that is what life and love are really like.  As we view social media, we will think, somehow we missed the boat!   

We must have the vision of God, and that only comes through His word.  He speaks truth.  I want to live by His words and dwell on them alone – “How precious to me are your thoughts, O God” (Psalm 139:17). 

Today, change the focus.  Get a clear vision of what God says about you. That is truth.   Adjust your spiritual glasses and see clearly.  You are fearfully and wonderfully made.  It’s time to believe that. Have faith to see yourself through God’s eyes.

“Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.” Matthew 10:31 

Dealing with a broken leg, foot and ankle has altered my lifestyle tremendously.  Most of my days are spent sitting with my leg elevated, occasionally using a wheel chair or knee scooter for the trip to get my lunch out of the refrigerator, or make my way to my bedroom at night.

My doctor’s instructions are that I am to put no weight on my foot for six to eight weeks, and keep the leg elevated.  It sounds so simple, but I am so tired of the routine. Some days I just don’t want to do what it takes to get well.  Yet, every day I obediently do my part.  Why?  Because I want to get well.  I want to walk again.  I want to get back to living again.

I want to get well.

Chapter five of the book of John relates quite a story of a man who had been crippled for thirty-eight years.  He spent his days lying on a mat.  Many scholars believe it was probably a small 3’ by 5’ mat that became his world by the Pool of Bethesda.   He would lay there daily, hoping that it was his day of healing.   

Enter Jesus.

Jesus asked an interesting question to the man in verse six, “Do you want to get well?”  Really, Jesus?  What a silly question!  Perhaps it wasn’t so silly.  The man’s response was to give all the reasons why he couldn’t be healed.  He lived in captivity to a 3’ by 5’ world.

As I talk with people, I’ve been tempted to ask, “Do you want to get well?”  I hear reason after reason why they can’t get beyond the prison of their 3’ by 5’ world. 

I get it!  I really do.  I’ve known sexual abuse, miscarriage, the loss of a child, and a score of other things – things that invited me to live in a 3’ by 5’ world.  It’s often more inviting to do mat time, than to walk the process of healing.

My heart is gripped when I listen to the painful stories of people’s lives.  Life can be brutal.   I believe many must answer the question, “Do you want to get well?”  Sometimes the journey is slow and difficult.  As with my leg, we will sometimes still feel the pain while awaiting the healing to be completed.

Jesus came to deliver us from a 3’ by 5’ life.  We won’t always receive instant healing.  We certainly can’t turn back the clock and erase what brought pain and brokenness into our lives.    Jesus sought out a man who needed healing.  Jesus is always seeking those who are broken, and need His healing.   

Jesus is still asking the question, “Do you want to get well?”

Let’s try to unpack this question by looking at it in a different light. Perhaps Jesus was digging deeper and asking things like: Do you really want things to change? Are you ready to leave behind all of the excuses? 

Do you ever feel like you are stuck in a 3’ by 5’ world?  Enter Jesus!  There is a big world out there, so don’t let pain and brokenness keep you on the mat.   Jesus is ready to help you get off that mat, and walk into healing.

As I stare at this elevated, black-casted leg, I wish it was instantly healed.  I wish I could turn back time and change that moment that brought such pain and discomfort to my life.   It would be easy to wallow in my sorrow and pain. 

But … I want healing.  I want to get beyond the pain, and off the limitations of a 3’ by 5’ world.  I do the things I need to do for healing.  Therapy is down the road, and I will do the things I need to do for healing.  I want to get well.   Do you?

“Heal me, LORD, and I will be healed; save me and I will be saved, for you are the one I praise.” – Jeremiah 17:14